Anna Kendrick Reveals She Created Embryos with Her Toxic Ex Before Relationship Shifted

Speaking with Dax Shepard and Monica Padman on the podcast Armchair Expert_the _Alice, Darling actress, 37, opened up about having made embryos with anunidentified ex, who was “for all intents and purposes, my husband.”

“I was with someone — this was somebody I lived with, for all intents andpurposes my husband. We had embryos together, this was my person,” she shared.”And then about six years in, about somewhere around there, I remember tellingmy brother, when things had first kind of gone down, ‘I’m living with astranger. Like, I don’t know what’s happening.'”

Explaining that she’d seen a personality shift and her partner later revealedhe had feelings for someone else, Kendrick explained she continued to try andwork on the relationship through couple’s therapy despite the continuedbehavior.

“It wasn’t just the, ‘Oh, I’m losing a relationship.’ It was that I believedthat if we broke up or, you know, if he left Basically, it was a confirmationthat it’s because I’m impossible, I’m lucky that he’s even tolerating my b—t.”

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Anna Kendrick attends the "Alice, Darling"  Premiere during the 2022 TorontoInternational FilmFestivalAnnaKendrick attends the "Alice, Darling"  Premiere during the 2022 TorontoInternational FilmFestival

Anna Kendrick attends the “Alice, Darling” Premiere during the 2022 TorontoInternational Film Festival

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images Anna Kendrick

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“There was an inherent thing of me being so rejectable that this person wholoved me very deeply for six years, it suddenly occurred to him, how awful Iwas or something,” she continued. “The shame, that lingers much longer.”

Kendrick recalled how she “dismantled” her life to deal with the tumultuousnature of the relationship in hopes of what it could be if things were fixed.

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“I did start going to Al-Anon while all this was going on. I mean, look, Itruly dismantled my life, and at first, that was as a reaction to theaccusation that I was crazy and I was the one causing the problem,” sheexplained. “So I had a conversation with CAA, my agency and said I need totake time off, I have a mental health problem.”

She continued, “I started seeing two therapists a week and I started trying tolearn to meditate and I got into Al-Anon and all of these things ended upbeing very wonderful things for me in the long run, but initially went intothem thinking “Tell me how to stop being crazy. Tell me how to stop feelinganything.” “

AnnaKendrickAnnaKendrick

Anna Kendrick

Isa Foltin/Getty Anna Kendrick

In September, Kendrick opened up to PEOPLE about how Alice’s story in her film_Alice, Darling_ “resonated” with her for a specific reason.

“I was coming out of a personal experience with emotional abuse andpsychological abuse,” she shared, recalling the time she first came across thescreenplay. “I think my rep sent it to me, because he knew what I’d beendealing with and sent it along. Because he was like, ‘This sort of speaks toeverything that you’ve been talking to me about.’ “

“It felt really distinct in that I had, frankly, seen a lot of movies aboutabusive or toxic relationships, and it didn’t really look like what washappening to me,” she added. “It kind of helped me normalize and minimize whatwas happening to me, because I thought, ‘Well, if I was in an abusiverelationship, it would look like that.’ “

Describing her former relationship, Kendrick shares, “I was in a situationwhere I loved and trusted this person more than I trusted myself. So when thatperson is telling you that you have a distorted sense of reality and that youare impossible and that all the stuff that you think is going on is _not_going on, your life gets really confusing really quickly. And I was in asituation where, at the end, I had the unique experience of finding out thateverything I thought was going on was in fact going on. So I had this kind ofspringboard for feeling and recovery that a lot of people don’t get.”