Chloë Grace Moretz reflects on becoming a ‘Family Guy’ meme

Chloë Grace Moretz has grown to be a staple in Hollywood since having herbreakthrough moment in 2010 at just 12 years old and booking big gigsconsistently in the decade since. However, her journey hasn’t been withoutdifficulty as the now 25-year-old reflects on the intense scrutiny that she’sdealt with as a public figure.

In an interview for hunger magazine, Moretz said that she remembers the daythat she became aware of her fame when she was still just a teen. “It hit melike a ton of bricks. I was 18 and doing a red carpet. I walked off of it andI felt so much self-loathing and was really confused about the experience thatjust went down. I was really unwell after that ,” she said. “There was thiscomplete jarring shift in my consciousness, I questioned who I was. What am Idoing? Who am I? Why am I doing this? Like, what does this mean?”

It was years prior that Moretz had her first encounter with the paparazziafter she starred in the film Kick-Ass. Now, she calls it a distant memoryalthough it was unfortunately unforgettable.

“I was a kid and 90 percent of the time no one would really bother me. Butafter Kick-Ass , the first time I experienced paparazzi, it was 10 to 15adult guys surrounding a 12-year-old girl,” she recalled. “They pushed my momand she ended up falling into traffic — she didn’t get hurt, but the situationwas really chaotic. It’s an assault on all the senses, with screaming andflashes. I got into the car afterwards and I just burst into tears. I thinkthat’s my marker of before and after.”

Still, it wasn’t until she was older that she truly experienced “the darknessthat comes with fame,” as she grappled with the way that she was representedin the public sphere and how little control she seemed to have over that.

“For a long time I was able to be the Chloë that people see and the Chloë thatI am in private. Then those two worlds collided and I felt really raw andvulnerable and open,” she said. “And then came the onslaught of horrific memesthat started getting sent to me about my body.”

Story continues

While social media has played a role in the way that celebrities interact withtheir fans in an authentic way, it also provides an opportunity for people toengage with public figures on their own terms. For Moretz, there’s a standoutincident in which a photo that circulated took a hit on her confidence.

“There was one meme that really affected me, of me walking into a hotel with apizza box in my hand. And this photo got manipulated into a character from_Family Guy_ with the long legs and the short torso, and it was one of themost widespread memes at the time,” she said. “Everyone was making fun of mybody and I brought it up with someone and they were like, ‘Oh, shut the f***up, it’s funny.’ And I just remember sitting there and thinking, my body isbeing used as a joke and it’s something that I can’t change about who I am,and it is being posted all over Instagram. It was something so benign aswalking into a hotel with leftovers. And to this day, when I see that meme,it’s something very hard for me to overcome.”

Moretz said that she’s turned to therapy to “work through” all that comes withher celebrity. After the meme incident, it even became the more exciting partsof her job that felt compromised.

“It took a layer of something that I used to enjoy, which was getting dressedup and going to a carpet and taking a photo, and made me super self-conscious.And I think that body dysmorphia — which we all deal with in this world — isextrapolated by the issues of social media,” she explained. “It’s a headf***.”

As a result, the actress said she “basically became a recluse” to take somemuch needed time out of the spotlight so that she could ground herself in aprivate setting. That came with pros and cons.

“It was great because I got away from the photographers and I was able to bemyself, and to have so many experiences that people didn’t photograph, but atthe same time it made me severely anxious when I was photographed,” she said .”My heart rate would rise and I would hyperventilate.”

Moretz admitted that she was appreciative of getting a break from the publiceye during the pandemic, especially as people became more incognito as aresult of mask wearing.

“I just put a hat on, put a mask on and then put my hood up and would be ableto get away with a lot more, like go to a concert or bite my lip or haveundocumented pimples,” she said. “For me it was a time of introspection. Ilost my father during the pandemic, not due to COVID-related issues, but therewas a big amount of change in a really transformative time period. After thathappened I had to go to London to start filming [ The Peripheral ]. And Ithink that working again came at the perfect time in a lot of ways.”

And even as work and life continue to evolve back to business as usual, she isset on incorporating more time off into her schedule.

“It’s a new thing I’m doing,” she said. “Taking time to refill my cup. It’sall about boundaries and using your voice.”

Wellness, parenting, body image and more: Get to know the ** who*behind the* ** hi with Yahoo Life ‘s newsletter. Sign up here