Constance Wu is opening up about her suicide attempt in 2019 and theaftermath.
the Crazy Rich Asians and Hustlers actress appeared on Wednesday’s RedTable Talk via Facebook Watch, to discuss the shocking revelations in herbook, Making a Scene. They include being sexually harassed and intimated bya male Fresh Off the Boat producer __ and, later, facing backlash fortweeting her disappointment that the show had been renewed for another season.Being “canceled” over her tweets — with hate coming at her from manydirections, including from the Asian American community — led to herattempting suicide.
At her lowest moment amid the backlash, Wu wrapped herself in a blanket andstood on the ledge of her fifth floor balcony overlooking her New York Citystreet. As she considered her fate, a friend who came to check on her, “pulledme over – from climbing over the ledge.”
The friend “dragged” Wu “into the elevator, [put] me into a cab and took me toa psychiatric emergency room” for life-saving mental health treatment.
“I slept the night on a cot in the waiting room of the psychiatric ER underobservation,” she said. The next morning, she began counseling and then shestarted therapy with a psychiatrist and psychologist every day.
“I needed it. I was unsafe at that point,” she recalled. “I was in a mentalplace of just beating myself up. And so much shame. Feeling like I didn’tdeserve to live. Feeling like the world hated me. Feeling like I ruinedeverything for everyone. Maybe I did for some people , but, you know, peoplemake mistakes, right?”
When Wu posted those infamous tweets, the public didn’t know that she claimsto have endured sexual harassment by a Fresh Off the Boat producer. Theyjust thought she was a “diva,” “ungrateful” and that she thought she hadbecome “too good for the show” after the success of her the film Crazy RichAsians.
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“With the information the public had, of course I don’t fault people forthinking that,” she said. “What people didn’t realize that during my firstcouple years on [the hit show lauded for its Asian representation]I wassexually harassed and I was intimidated and I was threatened — all thetime.”
The Asian American producer, whom she didn’t identify “was so derogatory andharassing toward me” and she feared speaking up “because this show was sort ofa beacon of representation for Asian Americans and I sort of became a symbolof representation. I didn’t want to sully the one show with sexual harassmentclaims against the one Asian American man who was doing all this work [tobetter] the community. So that’s what happened when I tweeted that stuff. Itseemed out of character if you don’t know me and know all the pain and abuse Ihad to swallow for years. The reason I’m crying now is because you have to behonest about it as it happens, so that it doesn’t come out after the way it[did for me].”
She explained the sexual harassment, saying the producer would tell her how hepreferred her hair. Told her to wear short skirts. Rated her friends onwhether he’d “f***” them or not. He texted her at night requesting sexyselfies. “He kept tabs on all areas of my life,” she said.
She felt “guilty” thinking she somehow played a role in it. “This is my firstever big TV show,” she said. Her mindset had been: “I gotta pretend I’m partof the boys’ club. I gotta pretend I’m cool with this talk.”
Constance Wu on Red Table Talk. (Photo: Jordan Fisher)
She also claims he touched her inappropriately. He pressured her into going toa basketball game. He told her how to dress. While there, he rubbed her legand put his hand over her crotch. She told him to stop, which she said angeredhim and he ignored her in retaliation.
Wu spoke up to a couple people, but nobody encouraged her to go to HR and shedidn’t think she’d be believed without evidence. She said she now knows thatshe should have reported it — because even if it didn’t help her at the time,it would start a record and potentially help others in the future. She wasultimately able to cut him out for the remaining three to four years of theshow.
The Season 5 finale of Fresh Off the Boat was written to be the seriesfinale. She said ABC gave her its blessing to pursue other projects. Then hermovie Crash Rich Asians was a big success and the network decided to renewthe show. It was “sort of a bad look to cancel the one Asian American sitcom,”she said. Wu, still under contract and required to do Season 6, felt “lied to”and disappointed because she wouldn’t get the “clean slate I was lookingforward to.” Plus, she had to drop out of projects she had lined up.
So she tweeted, which she now knows wasn’t the right move, about her upsetabout the renewal. She said the backlash was immediate and it was especiallyhurtful that the Asian Americans “were the ones who piled on” the most. Thebiggest sting was getting direct messages from a former colleague, an Asianactress, “who should have been my ally.”
The messages — accusing her of sullying the one shining beacon of hope forAsian Americans — stung. That triggers her suicidal thoughts.
Wu discussed messages she received from an Asian actress. (Red Table Talk)
After Wu’s tweet backlash, she dropped off of social media for three years.She didn’t discuss her suicide attempt or hospitalization publicly and triedto keep a low profile. She recalled in the immediate aftermath being “punishedand mocked” — and recalled a story about attending a gala honoring AsianAmerican icons and changemakers in the entertainment industry in late 2019.
Fresh Off the Boat was being honored at the event and there was so muchcontroversy around her that she initially declined to attend. Plus, she was ina “raw place” and didn’t want to be the target of mockery. She expressed thisand was told she was beloved and it would “only be warm energy and positivevibes” if she came. She said it was a bait and switch.
“They sat me in the front row, and had all these cameras on me, and within 10minutes the host of the show made a crack at me,” she recalled. “I was sittingthere alone trying not to cry in a public setting… They had promised theywouldn’t mock me and they did it right off the bat. I felt like they weresetting me up… It felt like a betrayal from the Asian American community. Acouple months prior to that, I was in the emergency room.”
She said the host — Simu Liu — “did the right thing and he apologized. It wasa sincere apology.”
Wu’s book of essays is out now and also shares that she was sexually assaultedin her twenties.
If you or someone you know are experiencing suicidal thoughts, call 911, orcall the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or text HOMEto the Crisis Text Line at 741741.